In a comic note, I've tried to translate "end of day" into latin, using Google, and it came up like that - "End of Dies". Makes me remember an arcade game of The X-Men, where Magneto screams, at the very beggining of the game, "Welcome to die!" - so that's must've been what he was trying to say, "Welcome to the day...."
Shut up.
Yeah, I'm not fucking funny. Specially not today, where I got the blues on higher notes, notes that not even Carbona(that's how I christened my Epi Explorer, the goth one) na her hi-acess neck would go. Nowhere near.
I just feel sad. Not depressed, no. Sad. Believe me, I lived with this bitch, this fucking whore called "depression" for nearly all my life; I know the difference between feeling the blues and depression.
Right now, as of today, I'm the blue zone.
Why?
Because I've been thinking about the fucking future. What it still holds in store for me.
It's not bright, let me tell you. First thing I'm expecting, I shit you not, on a daily basis - the information that one of my parents have died. They're not exactly young nor healthy, the both of them - and I'm still fully, fucking fully, DEPENDANT on them. On their money. On their house. On their food.
A fucking 38-year old child.
And believe me, I know, I just KNOW there'll be a fucking SHITSTORM when both of them are gone. We don't have that many possessions anymore, not in terms of land, anyway. We just got this house - I will not lie, it's one helluva nice house - and maybe two, three lots of land.
I'm betting all my chips that my scumbag of a brother will make a fuss over this place. Oh yeah, he will. And who's gonna finish up without a roof on his fucking head? ME. Because I know the snake that is my blood brother. The brother I didn't get to choose, that was chosen for me.
I'm betting you, when my parents die, there'll be hell to pay. For me, at least. And for my younger sister as well, because, well, she's much kinda in the same boat I am. We live here. We have nowhere else to go! We can't afford it.
And the Boss called, my Owner, asking me to draw him something. Sorry. No can do, I don't do that shit anymore. Not since 2011. I could've pulled out some money for me! But...no, man, sorry.
No future. No skills. No talent. No money. Nowhere, no-one.
No one.
That's me. Pleasure to make your acquaintance. But I'll hate you soon enough, don't worry.
No one.
At nowhere. Going somewhere, he just don't know, he just don't care!
But life will fuck you in the butt, life will fuck in the butt,
And yet still you don't care.
Oh, I care. That's why I wanna be dead in ten years, no, make it five. Because I don't wanna watch the freakshow that'll be the battle over our parent's scraps. I know I'll end up fucked, so might as well die before such thing happens, don't you think??
End of Dies, indeed.
