Alone.

I am alone.
I was alone.
I've always been alone.

In a world
of nearly eight billion
humans,
I feel like I'm
the only one
I feel alone
and alone I feel.
all the drugs,
all the food,
all of all

Goodbye,

I am alone.
Every face
is faceless
means nothing
knows nothing
I want to get out

But I never did,
I am stuck
on myself,
I'm retarded,
Depressed,
ill-dressed,
ridiculous
to the rest.

What rest?
who they are
who are they,
those ghosts
around me,
mean nothing at all,
nothing.

As do I -
I know.
No legacy,
no friends,
nothing at all
never knew
how to feel
anything
but
loneliness,

my whole life,
the weirdo,
my whole existence,
did not exist.

I am alone,
and alone I shall die.

Dragons and methods; or how to live, drunkenly a whole entire life...

Yesterday, it was.
yesterday, it has been.
yesterday, I wish it was,
yesterday, I wish I'd be

Nothing...around me
nothing...and plenty of things
nothing?...Nobody
nobody has ever been,
nobody has ever seen,
nobody had ever be,
nobody, not you, not me.

Me?...I'm nothing but myself,
I'm always by myself,
I've always, ever will be,
Alone, in this room,
alone in an empty room,
alone, in a brain
that won't shut
the fuck up.

I'm always by myself,
I'm always bi-collateral,
Bi-sexual, Been there, never done that,
been there, all by myself,

There's nobody here,
nobody else,
no one cares,
no one ever will.

Drunk, i'm slightly drunk,
at 8 AM on a sunday morning,
blame the Irish,
blame the Bailey's
mixed with my coffee,
cigarettes & alcohol,
ethanol & nicotine.

I...am nobody.
I am some body,
some corpse,
that walks around,
do nothing,
win a plaque,
ironic and opaque,
10 years of nothing
summed up
on an opaque plaque.

I am alive,
Am I really alive?

Am I?

For I've done nothing,
Been nothing,
been the one to blame,
sadness and sorrow,
emptiness and loneliness,

I look at the mirror,
I see somebody,
nobody
that
has
been.

I'm dead and alive,
at the same time,
feel the joy,
corrodes into sorrow.